One Year, And A Life Time Ahead

A year ago today, I embarked on a life long journey. I became a nonsmoker. So many times I had tried to stop smoking and had failed. This time was different. This time I had an army of supporters - family and friends - both online and off. This time I had Chantix, my miracle drug. The drug that helped me to finally kick the habit. One year - the longest I've ever been able to quit in my 12 years of smoking.

Besides taking Chantix, the one other major reason why I believe I have been so successful with this quit is because my husband quit as well. We stuck in there together and are all that more successful because of it. His one year anniversary will be next Wednesday.

It's amazing how great I feel today. I can take a deep breath and not feel like my lungs are going to explode. I will never miss smelling like an ashtray - and kidding myself when I thought that spraying myself with a yummy smelling spray could hide that smell.

I no longer feel the guilt that I use to feel when I thought of the years I was robbing myself of. The years that I might not have had if I continued to be a smoker. The years of my children's (and grandchildren's) lives that I might have shorted myself of.

Tonight I asked my daughter, who was the one that was always on me to quit, if she knew what tomorrow was and she had no idea. Another person might have been disappointed, but I was glad that she had no idea what I was talking about. I was glad because cigarettes are so far from her life now that it doesn't even register to her anymore. Glad because by quitting, I have probably made it more likely that she will never pick up a cigarette herself.

I did it! And I will continue to do it - for myself and for my family.

Nine Months

Wow, yesterday marked nine months since I quit smoking and I didn't even realize it until last night. This is the longest I've ever stayed quit and I'm pretty confident that it will stick. I honestly can't see myself ever going back.

Last night, my friend Teri and I went out for a couple of drinks and the thought to smoke never occured to me once. The Illinois smoking ban (thank God for that!) I'm sure has a lot to do with that.

Three more months until I make it to the one year mark!

No More Excuses

I have been a nonsmoker for 3 months and 1 week. It sure seems like it should be longer than that though - a good thing, I'm sure. I really don't keep track much anymore. The only reason I knew I had passed the 3 month mark is because the little ticker over there to the left told me so. I'm down to taking just one Chantix pill in the morning and am ready to go off. I still can't remember to take the darn things and I'm tired of the headaches, nausea, moodiness and being tired. It's time to get back to being myself again.

So now with 3 months under my belt, it's time to stop making excuses for gaining weight and not taking care of myself. I've put on 15 pounds (and trust me, I didn't need it to begin with) since I quit smoking. It's been forever since my last visit to the darn gym. Between sick kids, school carnivals, time changes and being sick myself, it's time to go back. Body Step tomorrow morning at 9am. No excuses.

To give myself a little jump start and some motivation, I dragged out the stack of Weight Watchers books from the back of my kitchen cabinet, dusted them off and recorded my points for today. I've been watching what I've been eating today and was pretty excited to see how I was doing. Apparently, not so well. I have 3 points left for dinner. Not good.

Must Sit Down And Write Post

You'd think that with the school carnival being over, I'd have time to breathe. I've still been pretty busy tying up loose ends and trying to figure out our profit. I swear, you can tell people until you're blue in the face to get their reimbursement forms in on time, but there are always some that don't listen. So, I still don't know what our profit is yet. I keep trying to get numbers from our treasurer, but she's not done yet and it's frustrating. Until I get those numbers, I can't even come up with a rough estimate. So I wait.

Saturday night couldn't have run any smoother than it did. Everything went off without a hitch. Many parents and teachers have said that this year was more organized than ever and that the kids finally had enough to do to keep them busy. In the past, it's always been about making money through the Raffle and the kids ended up bored because they haven't had enough to do to last the whole night. This year we added all kinds of activities and games and it was a huge success. The kids had a blast and the parents were impressed. That's what matters.

As I mentioned in a previous post, my family and I did pretty well in the Raffle ourselves this year. We won the iPod Nano Video (that is now mine after finessing it out of my daughter's hands), a Picnic In The Park classroom basket filled with all kinds of fun stuff, a Cold Stone Creamery Gift Basket (which reminds me that I have to order Ashley's ice cream cake for tomorrow), ice skating passes, a small gift bag that included a $15 gift card to Anecdotes, a small gift shop here in Peoria, and a bunch of free kids meal at Chili's. My mother in law won a Remote Control Helicopter for the kids to play with at her house. I'd say we all made out pretty well.

While Bret and Ryan enjoyed the carnival, Ashley and her friend ran a booth all night. They worked their butts off. The only moment I got to sit down was to eat dinner with my family for about 15 minutes. I had Bret go through the line and get all of our dinners and met up with him and the kids at the table. My reasoning was that the carnival had me all night, but I was determined to eat dinner with my family. Once dinner was over, I did indeed run around all night, making sure everything ran smoothly and keeping the DJ on track. It was a lot of fun, but when I did finally get home and into bed, the wheels in my head were still spinning at a hundred miles per hour.

There have also been some new developments since all this started. A week before the carnival, our PTO President announced that she and her family are being transferred over seas to Australia for 3 years through her husband's job at Caterpillar. He leaves this weekend. She and the kids leave next month. It's going to be really sad when they go because she has done so much for the school this year. I'm now preparing to learn how to run the PTO for the remainder of the year in her shoes. Will someone please knock me in the side of the head to see if my common sense returns?

Throughout all of this, I've remained smoke free. Over the weekend I did have some really strong cravings to smoke. I got through them, but it wasn't fun. I've been trying to get back on the Chantix since my doctor's appointment, but I just can't remember to take it - or my other medicine. Life should start to calm down now this week, which might help, but I'm not sure what to do with the Chantix. I don't want to slip up, but I just can't remember to take the darn stuff. Without it, I do notice more cravings so it may be best to try and discipline myself into taking it.

Ok. I'm off to try and get my poor neglected house back in order. Everyone is about out of clean underwear here and I've been trying to get the bathrooms clean since last Wednesday.

Back From The Brink

(I have no idea what is up with Blogger and their line spacing problem these days!)

I'm back. Did anyone miss me? Does anyone still come here? It feels like forever since I've posted.

I'm still not smoking. How, through out all of this stress I've been under the past week or two, I've managed not to smoke is beyond me but I'm still going strong at 10 weeks and 3 days. I had an appointment for my annual physical on Friday with the doctor that prescribed my Chantix. She was proud of me, which in turn made me proud of myself. I told her that I've been weening off of the Chantix and even then am still not remembering to take it. She told me that she recommends patients to take the Chantix for 2-4 months longer than the recommended 12 weeks to keep them on track and to keep them quit. I've got a prescription to extend it, but am not sure what I should do. I do still get the tuggings, and while I get through those tuggings just fine, I am wondering if I should stay on the Chantix. The only reason I had stopped taking it was because I couldn't remember to take it routinely, so the nausea had been a real problem. We'll see.

In less than a week, the school carnival will be here. Friday the craziness will truely start and by Saturday evening it'll be all over with. I pray that it's a big success. As long as it makes as much money as it's made in the past and the kids have a great time, I'll be able to sleep at night again.

Below is our baby. My co-chair's husband made this Plinko board for the carnival. The kids have all complained that there weren't enough games in the past, so we've loaded them up with lots of choices, but this here below is our baby. I've put many, many coats of paint on it and am ready to add the letters and numbers to it now. (My house looks like a mini carnival with a Plinko board in the living room and a bozo type bucket game in the hallway.)

Along with planning the school carnival, Ashley has thrown a birthday sleepover party in the mix for the following weekend. She decided that she wanted Dance Dance Revolution for the game system downstairs to use during her party, so my mom and brother went in on it for her birthday. Bret has it playing through his stereo system and she's been practicing all day. I tried it - it wasn't pretty. LoL. But with that and Karaoke, I think she'll be set for her party now.

Ryan's Blue & Gold Banquet for Cub Scouts was tonight. His Den made a dragon costume to go with the whole theme they had going on. It was way to cute to see them trying to keep up with each other while they walked around the room.

Ryan earned his Tiger patch and 5 belt loops. (Guess I have to go buy the belt now.)

As soon as the banquet was over, we headed over to catch the rest of our Niece's birthday party.

Where they had trick candles. I love those things.

It's been a long day and I'm ready for bed. Last night we had friends over for dinner and drinks and I'm really dragging now. I'll try not to be such a stranger, but it may be difficult until after next weekend.

Coming Off Of The Chantix

It's time folks. I can no longer take the nausea and the moodiness. I have 11 days worth of Chantix left. Over the past couple of weeks, I've forgotten to take it more times than I can count. When I have taken it, my system isn't use to it since there hasn't been a constant level of it inside of me, and I'm overcome with nausea within 5 minutes. So, I've taken my last 1 mg dose of Chantix tonight. I've cut a week's worth in half and added them to other stuff I take daily. (Yes, I should really be 30 years older than I am.) I am now going to try and remember to take a half of pill twice a day for the next week and then just one half a day until they are gone.

I went back and forth with the idea of just not taking them anymore, but am a bit nervous that the tuggings will get stronger or more frequent as the Chantix leaves my system. I also worry that as spring approaches and I'm outside with the kids a lot again, it may be harder to stay quit. That was one of my major triggers. Being outside.

However, I really think at this point that is up to me to continue to stay strong. I'm proud of myself and have no intention of ever starting back up again. None of my friends smoke, my husband is still quit and you can no longer smoke in public places here in Illinois. So, this time is for good.

My neighbors will probably thank us when spring comes and they aren't smelling the smoke that drifts their way with the warm breeze.

I Am So Regretting That Nap

Earlier tonight, I wasn't feeling very well. All of a sudden I was just wiped out and really sick to my stomach. I hadn't taken my second Chantix yet, so I really didn't think it was that, even though it has been messing up my stomach again lately. I also skipped lunch and had my blood sugar take a dive in the middle of grocery shopping at Kroger late this afternoon. That's my best guess as to what happened.

I feel better now, but pretty much passed out on the couch while we were all just kind of hanging out watching TV. I was so cold that I couldn't warm up for anything and my body felt like it was being weighed down. The last thing I remembered was talking to my friend Teri on the phone and then waking up.

The problem now? I was passed out for 2 1/2 hours. Now I'm the furthest thing from tired and it's 11:15pm. I have to be up at 6am so I can shower and get Ashley to school for Volleyball practice in the morning - and then be functional enough to take care of two babies.

It may be a long night...

Day 48

I have been a nonsmoker for 48 days. That's 6 weeks and 6 days. Tomorrow will be the 7 week mark. I've saved $196 since quitting. Double that amount with Bret quitting, too. It's amazing, really. We knew we were spending a fortune on it, but we chose not to think about it too deeply. I also know that both of us successfully quitting at the same time has contributed to our success.


Never before did I think that it could be this easy. Anyone out there wanting to quit only has to give Chantix a try. It's the miracle drug we've all been waiting for. Sure, there are days when I have a tugging that feels somewhat strong, but it only takes some redirection and I'm past it.


My message today at getquit.com was to test myself. Their idea of testing myself is to put myself into a position where I am exposed to smoking in some way. While I'm pretty sure I could handle it, I've done that already. For Teri's birthday we went out to a bar where the smoke was so heavy that I found it offensive. When I got home, my clothes were in the washer and I was in the shower so fast that you would have missed it had you blinked.


So I'm going to test myself in a different way. I'm going into the deep abyss of Ryan's room to deal with the Lego situation. Ever since Christmas, his new Lego's have taken up residence in my living room. I'm going to dig my way through all of those Lego's in his room and make room for his new ones. Somehow I'll do it, but it will be no easy task!


See for yourselves... (My father in law will have a heart attack when he sees these, as he is the other Lego Collector in the family.)

So, this would be a project I've put off since well before Christmas. Mostly because of lack of time, put also because my patience level hasn't been that great, either. Today is the day it gets under control. Which means I'll be working on this all week. Wish me luck!

Slowly Getting There

I'm not sure if this project is ever going to get done. My house is in a state of total disarray and there are wires everywhere.

This TV is a lot bigger than I thought it would be and not quite as decorative looking as a mirror or picture. I'm not sure if I'll even be able to fit my picture frames and Willow Tree statues back up on the mantle. Hopefully, we'll be able to get the wiring hidden behind the wall. Bret and Scott are out right now looking into different options for that.

The picture and sound on this thing are amazing and it's not even a top of the line TV. (More like best value for your buck kind of line.) Can you really go wrong when Tom Petty's involved, though?

As an afterthought, Bret brought some speakers up from the basement to see if the sound would come through them on the old TV - and it worked. Figures, so the old one found it's way to the downstairs family room for it's second chance at life.

So, the new TV is up, but far from finished. It needs to be centered, which is thankfully easy to do, or I'd probably lose my mind. My house looks awful right now and I'm dying to get it cleaned up - but the TV sure is pretty, isn't it?

Just think - if we hadn't quit smoking, we probably wouldn't have been able to afford this. Of course we've probably only saved a fraction of what this cost us in the two months (almost) of both of us being nonsmokers, but it sure did help!

Can you tell who has the remote right now?

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go knock my children's heads together for they are driving me absolutely crazy with their fighting!

Yippee!

I wasn't feeling too motivated this morning to take my butt to the gym. It was freezing cold outside and a bit icy, plus I was tired. It had been two days since I had been there for Body Pump and my right knee has been killing me - stupid lunges - so I was prepared to talk myself out of it, even though usually once I get there I end up enjoying it.

Then I got on the scale and saw that I have lost 7.5 pounds since I started working out 3 weeks ago. I'm not really eating differently, but I've cut back on the lattes and am trying to cook us meals at night so that we don't end up resorting to fast food at the last minute. I had been discouraged because I had put on nine pounds since quitting smoking and the number on the scale hasn't budged - until now.

Usually I would notice a 7.5 pound loss, but it seemed like it just went away overnight. Finally all my hard work in those hour long classes at the gym have started paying off.

So, 1.5 more to go until I'm back to what I was before quitting smoking - and then I can work on losing what needed to come off before then. Yippee.

Blame It On The Mojito

We had our monthly PTO meeting tonight and I sat down here to work on that, but Teri (my co-chair) took me out to Friday's for an Ulitmate Mojito (Man, is it going to take awhile to finish this with how slow I'm having to type.) and I'm probably not going to get much done....um....correctly?

I made myself go to Body Attack at Gold's this morning. All by myself with out my little gym buddies. I told myself that if I could get through the first half and make it to the running track that I'd let myself leave if I wanted to. Of course I didn't end up leaving. I pushed my way through it and let me tell you - there's a reason they call it Body Attack. By the time an hour was up and we had made it to the last track, I could barely lift my leg up to kick and forget the freaking knee repeaters. But I did it and have lived to tell about it.

I've made an unpleasant discovery, though. The shortness of breath and wheezing I get during that class weren't entirely smoking related. It was better this time as a nonsmoker, but I had to hit my inhaler half way through. Maybe that will get better over time, too. This class is tough - there were times I could feel my heart trying to jump out of my chest, but I just have to remember it was just as tough before and it got easier after a couple of weeks then, too.

So, if I'm still able to move in the morning, I'll be going back to body pump tomorrow to further torture myself. And on Friday? Body Step - yes it's step aerobics, but just as brutal in the cardio area as body attack and just as brutal as it sounds. Sounds fun, right? (I'm actually looking forward to it.)

Time to go sleep off the lingering effects of the mojito...

Cleaning Is My Enemy

There's something about cleaning my house that brings on stronger than usual tuggings to smoke, which may be why I've let the chores slack lately. My house is now clean and I dare you to find a dust bunny anywhere, but man those tuggings. I'd have to sit down and regroup and remember that it's been 41 days now since I quit and that I didn't really want one. What I wanted was a break - an excuse to procrastinate. But I got through it and am still proud of myself for being strong.

Did you know that when one quits smoking, their dog becomes depressed? Poor Daisy lays around looking at us with sad, mopey eyes and wonders what the heck is wrong with us. She misses her frequent field trips out to the side of the garage where we would be stay at home busy bodies and take inventory on what was going on in the neighborhood. Now I never think to go outside and Daisy doesn't tell us when she has to go - she just holds it. Plus I don't get my daily dose of neighborhood gossip anymore. I have no desire to go outside where it's usually cold and windy this time of year and I no longer need to go out and pretend smoke my short stubby straw or hollowed out cigarette that Bret stuffed with pieces of paper towel that first week of my quit. (I do still have little straws in every sweatshirt, jacket and jeans pocket I own though.) So, poor Daisy gets let out in the morning when the kids go to school and then by 2 or 3pm I realize she hasn't been out in forever and end up feeling like the world's worst dog owner. Thank goodness Bret remembers to feed her in the morning or she'd probably starve to death.

Anyway, my house is clean and the dog got to go outside tonight (after Bret reminded me 3 times) so I'm heading off to bed - before midnight for a change.

Get Over It

It's been a lot of fun reading people's comments on the website for our local newspaper here in Peoria, but I do feel sorry for them.

"... My husband and I are both smokers and we have decided we will no longer patronize bars and restaurants due to this smoking ban. I find it hard to believe this will not impact the bars and restaurants in Illinois. ... it's just hard to believe this will not impact especially the smaller business owners. The other thing is I'm still waiting for a ban on stinky perfume. I have asthma, that is not triggered by my smoking, but perfume will send me into a attack instantly..."

Hmm, your cigarette smoke doesn't bother you, but perfume does? I too, have asthma that is mostly exercise and allergy induced and smoking was the dumbest thing I could do to myself. When I went to bed and laid there wheezing and coughing, I was in denial, too.

While I do feel that the Illinois Statewide Smoking Ban is going to hurt some businesses and cost the state a whole lot of tax dollars as more and more people quit, I think smokers need to get over it. Now 36 days into my quit, I find myself thinking of myself as a true ex-smoker. It's a nice feeling. As a smoker, I wasn't thrilled about the smoking ban but there's not a whole lot you can do about it. As an ex-smoker, I'm relieved by the ban, simply because that means less temptation for me and my husband to light up, less exposure for my children and a whole new set of places that we and other family members who are highly sensitive to second hand smoke can go back to for eating out. (I'm free for lunch anytime, Mom-In-Law...LOL.)

The biggest change in myself since quitting has been that I am open to admitting to the denial that I so frequently defended as a smoker. It was bad for me. It was making me sick. It made me smell awful. Even though I smoked outside and never in my minivan, the smell of it on me was not healthy for my kids and now that I've gotten whiffs of it on others here and there, I'm sorry that I ever made my kids smell it and didn't give them the choice.

Inventory

Body parts that hate me for making it to Body Pump at Gold's this morning: biceps, triceps, shoulders, back, abs, quads, calves, knees and even my rear end. I think every muscle group was put through torture at some point over the course of that hour. Does anyone have a handicap bar they can install in the bathroom for me? Tomorrow is probably going to feel worse. However, if you're going to do it, do it all the way. Right?

Tomorrow I have two babies here, so I may not be able to swing a visit to the gym in. If I'm still really sore, I may go in as soon as the kids are off to school to walk it out on a treadmill before baby Luke gets dropped off. Chloe did great in the daycare there again. There was another little girl around her age that she attached herself to when we walked in. She loves other kids, so this is perfect for her. (I still wiped her down with antibacterial wipes right before we left, though!)

During my two visits to the gym this week I noticed a difference since the last time I went when I was still smoking. I'm (hang on...have to go look it up...it's amazing how I don't really keep track lately) 35 days into my quit and already see a difference. Yesterday on the elliptical machine, my heart rate was lower than it use to be when I first started and I didn't tired as quickly as I expected myself to. Then during Body Pump this morning I definitely noticed having more energy. But the biggest change since quitting? No cough and no shortness of breath or wheezing while working out. That is huge! I may just plan on going back early tomorrow morning regardless of what the day holds.

Tuggings

I'ts been more than a week since I've had those little tuggings to smoke and they hit me a few times while I was working on planning this school fundraiser today. In fact, I had to backtrack through my blog to see when the last time I was having a rough patch was. While this wasn't really a "rough patch", I was getting frustrated and having a hard time concentrating. In her comment to my earlier post, MamaFlo helped put into words what I was feeling. (Thank you, MamaFlo.) It's so great to have people who know what you're going through. People who can put your feelings into words for you (without realizing that's what they're doing) so that you understand. In turn you recognize more quickly what you need to do to get past it. I haven't forgotten about you, either Jamie. Thanks, again for the card and the support. You made my day.

So to get my mind off of the little tuggings earlier, I made coffee. Or, um, I tried to make coffee. Three times. I've got to get off this Starbucks Peppermint Mocha thing, because I've gained 8 pounds since the holidays and quitting smoking began. (Yep, so much for that lost 5 pounds in the beginning thing - I gained that back, plus 3 more.) So now, not only do I need to get serious about losing some weight, I also need to learn how to make a decent cup of coffee that doesn't taste like wet coffee grinds. (Gag.) Can someone please teach me how to make a cup of coffee?

Running Away

After spending 2 1/2 hours last night and another 3 hours so far today on planning for the carnival at Ryan's school, I've decided that I'm going to run away and not come back until the thing is over and done with at the end of February. (She screams like a madwoman while pulling her hair out in front of the computer moniter.)

How in the world did you ever manage to get us sucked into chairing this thing, Teri?

Has anyone else taking Chantix had a harder time concentrating while talking this drug?

Rough Night

The Chantix dreams and nausea are back in full form. The nausea is probably due to not remembering to take the Chantix right after I eat, but it's also making me a little dizzy. Not remembering to take it may be a sign that I'll be ready to go off it when 12 weeks is up - we'll see.

Bret came home from work early yesterday due to an ear infection. He went up to Prompt Care to get an antibiotic and the doctor told him something about the Chantix that I haven't heard yet. First off, he said that Chantix is the only drug he's seen that really does help people stop smoking and that's he really impressed with the success rates. But he also said that after 21 days, you don't really need it anymore because by then the receptors in your brain have returned to normal. You're basically taking the drug at that point for psychological assurance. I hadn't heard that before. Has anyone else heard this?

So, not only is the nausea back, but the wierd dreams and insomnia are, too. Last night was rough. It was freezing cold in our bedroom, Bret was snoring and kept poking me with his foot (which makes me jump a mile high) and I couldn't fall asleep for anything. And that was with ear plugs in. So I took my pillows and camped out on the couch with a sleeping bag and laid awake for another hour, wishing I hadn't taken the ear plugs out because our wall clocks wouldn't stop ticking. If I hadn't been so cold, I would have thrown them into the garage. Once I did fall asleep, I woke up a short time later due to some crazy dream that I can't even really remember now.

Life must go on, though. The kids and I have a lunch date at Mickey D's at 11am with Shawn, so I must run. We're going to motivate each other into going back to the gym. She's been better about it than I have and it should make going back more fun. Here's a little preview of what Monday will be like.

Must. Get. Warm.

Our power was only out for three hours this morning, but it has yet to warm up in here. The thermostat reads 69, but it lies! My toes are like ice and I'm just plain cold.

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I had my appointment to get re-established with our old doctor from 3 years ago and was rather disappointed. I don't find him good looking anymore. Stop laughing - that's not what I was really going to say. While he's not quite so eye candyish anymore, that's not really the problem.

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I was a bit put off by his not so great bedside manner. The kids and I loved him 3 years ago and were crushed when we had to change doctors. We thought he was great. But today he didn't seem very friendly. He seemed stressed out, unfriendly and kept asking me the same questions repeatedly. Isn't your doctor suppose to be smarter than you?! No, for the second time - I don't need any refills. And no, for the 3rd time - I'm not having any problems. (Or does he have me confused with a different patient with short term memory loss and chronic problems?) (Quiet now, Bret.) Anyway, I was disappointed.

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I kept trying to talk to him about how I quit smoking and am taking Chantix and he couldn't keep the number of days I have been quit straight either. He also told me that I can only take it for 12 weeks. When I asked him about weening off of it, he said that usually people just stop taking it. Um, that's not what I've heard. Sigh. I was really hoping to stay on it for a bit longer than 3 months, but we'll see. It was my OB/GYN that actually prescribed it and I have my yearly appointment (sorry, TMI) in two weeks, so I'll bring it up with her instead.

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So, is my new (actually old) doctor on drugs or maybe he was just not feeling well? He did seem a little congested. But, seriously? He wasn't even really laughing at my jokes and I'm funny. Really, I am.

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Both Ashley and Ryan have their appointments with him tomorrow. Hopefully, I'll get a better impression then. Maybe it's just me he doesn't like. Humph. My little innocent crush is so over.

Happy 2008

So how many of us are going to have trouble remembering to write "08" instead of "07"?

Last night, we went over and stayed with Bret's Grandma while his parents went out for New Year's. It was a nice quiet night spent with family watching Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve on TV. We watched the ball drop in New York at 11pm and then headed home. I'm sad to report that Ryan and I were in bed before the clock even struck midnight. But on the bright side, Bret and I have officially made it through to 2008 as nonsmokers.

Tomorrow is going to be a crazy day. After more days off than I can count, Bret goes back to work and Chloe returns. (For those of you new friends of mine, Chloe is one of the babies I watch during the week.) I have my "get reaquainted with my old doctor from three years ago" appointment tomorrow since the City of Peoria decided to up and change insurance providers on us. Three years ago we had to go through all of this when Bret went to work for the city. Now that we've gotten use to all new doctors, we have to change back again. (Secretly, I'm okay with this as I refer to my old doctor as eye-candy. It's ok, Bret knows about my little crush and is letting me go back to him anyway. LoL.)

We did finally manage to go see Alvin & The Chipmunks today. (We didn't make it last week.) The kids seemed to like it and I thought it was hilarious, but then again I grew up watching The Chipmunks every day. Bret spent most of the movie wishing he hadn't taken his iPod out of his coat pocket before we left.

Well, I better call it a night so I can drag myself out of bed before Chloe gets here in the morning. That's the bad thing about having a week and a half to sleep in - it throws your body completely out of whack!

If I Could Get The Chance

If I could get the chance to say one thing to one person, it would be...

Dear Man At The Gas Station,

You have managed to change my life. On the Friday afternoon, the day after Thanksgiving, I ran into you at the Shell Gas Station while paying for my gas before leaving town for a weekend up in Chicago. I was also paying for cigarettes. You made a joke about saving a lot of money if I would just quit. We laughed and then you told me that the only reason you made the comment was because you had quit a month ago on Chantix. You changed my life that day.

You see, I had been looking into the drug for sometime now, but had never had the opportunity to ask someone who was actually taking it about the side effects. When you told me that you hadn't had any and that if you did, they would be better than dying, you triggered something deep inside me.

The following Monday when I arrived back in town, I called my doctor first thing and asked for a prescription for the Chantix. I have now been smoke free for 26 days and never before imagined that it could be this easy. You told me that it would be and you were right. Never before would I have believed that a stranger could have such a big impact in my life and I hope to have the chance to have an impact like that on someone else some day.

Thank you. I will now live a healthier, smoke free life. A life where I'll get to see my children grow up, get married and have kids of their own. As I approach my one month anniversary of being a nonsmoker, I'll think of you and wish you luck that you're still doing well, too.

Thank you,

Lynda

If you had the chance to say something to one person, what would it be?