Dear New Car Dealership,

Thank you for wasting 2 hours of my life today that I'll never be able to get back again. Yes, you were extremely friendly, but 2 hours for an oil change and tire rotation? Honestly, what were you doing back there all that time? Watching the "What A Girl Wants" movie that my daughter left in the DVD player?

The computer with internet hook up was a nice touch that kept my son occcupied on NickJr.com for a half an hour - but now I need to disinfect him because I could see the germs breeding on your filthy keyboard.

And the man sitting next to me in the waiting room? I kept waiting for him to signal that he was dying. His breaths were so loud and so deep I'm surprised he didn't keel over.

I'm not going to even go there about the foreign man on the cell phone who wasn't speaking English. Ryan kept asking me what he was saying over and over and over and over and yes- over and over again.

So now that I'm home, I have a headache and feel like I should have billed you for each hour that I spent in your germ infested waiting room and also for all of the magazines that Ryan put back on the magazine rack for you. (However, he was spinning that thing so fast that I'm not sure if you'll find it in working order - and I'm not sure if even I feel bad about that considering how much I paid you for the new van to begin with). Next time I think I'll be going to the Quickie Lube in town. I'm done with you unless it's warranty related and free of charge.